Lance had been puttering around the station and the Excalibur for a while, feeling a bit listless and lost. Well, ok, not a bit. The truth was he was feeling a listless and lost throughout everything going on lately. He was tired but then unable to sleep, he could drink to dull the senses but it never really seemed to help. He had been unhappy before but not like this, at least not in a very long time. He ended up roaming the halls of the station in the small hours of the morning, when no one was really about and the station was predominantly in “night mode” with very dim lights and just the sound of the stations automated systems filling the air. He didn’t want to go up to operations or even back to his ship, so he continues to walk through the residential areas of the station.
Drem had found herself not able to sleep the past few nights… She had alot on her mind, and it was still a bit hard to accept that lance was alive. She looked to her PADD, which had been fixed… lance would notice drem leaning on a wall, she was wearing uniform, but her hair was a bit messy… she had brushed it, but it was still messy… it was tied down and over her shoulder… her eyes had a tired, plain look…Her senses kicked in as she saw lance in the corner of her eye, walking the halls… she didn’t perk up like she usually did, but just lightly waved to him “Hello.” She said quietly…
He smiled at her as soon as he saw her there, it lit up his face. He was tired too, but it wasn’t wearing on him as much as it was her somehow. Probably due to the fact that he was used to going on no sleep for long periods of time. Times like this he thanked his lucky stars for the covert ops training and experience, allowing him to stay focused and alert even when he desperately wanted to sleep. Still, there she was, and he could tell things were wearing on her a great deal. “Hey.” he said stopping near her, “Bad night?”
She nodded lightly… “Yeah…” she was still amazed on how lance went without sleep that long, her arm rests down as she stops leaning on the wall and comes to a stand… she could still tell he was tired, and another thought that rang in her mind was how she could help… she wanted to help lance somehow, she felt bad…
“What are you up to?” She said, blinking a bit, her eyes had been in a blurry mode, so she blinked til she could see him properly again
It was going to be hard to her to figure out how to help him, when he didn’t even know how to help him. Lance was never someone who lacked in the ability to do what was needed to help himself, if he could figure out what that was. Years of working alone had taken their tole, in ways he didn’t even realize. She was asking him what he was doing? How could he put that into words that would not make him sound more insane than he already did… The answer was, he couldn’t. “I can’t sleep, just can’t stay still long enough. Looks like you’re having a similar night.”
She wasn’t thinking straight when she asked that… she just simply nodded… while she did want to talk, she decided she would be a bit quiet… it was obvious her mind was in different places at once…
she didn’t know what she was supposed to say after that… she stretches her arms, slowly leaning back onto the wall… she closes her eyes for a moment, sighing… should she do something to stop the silence? She didn’t mind it…
her PADD shows up ‘No results’ and she sighs, keeping her eyes closed… at least she was showing signs of wanting to help lance…
The silence stretched on between them until finally he asked, “What’s wrong Drem?” he moved a bit closer to her and also leaned on the wall, “It isn’t,” he paused then and considered, “I was going to say it isn’t like you to be this quiet, but I don’t really know do I?” he smiled at her and wasn’t sure how to make her feel more comfortable wit him.
She smiled lightly… she normally was quiet, If she began to rant or speak what she thought was too much, she’d always stop herself mid sentence… lance might’ve began to notice in the days that she’d been back, this drem was much quieter then the old… but it wasn’t bad, it was like her…
“Still trying to get used to being here.” She put it simply, opening her eyes and looking to him with a light smile
“Is it that different?” he asked her with a smile, his face seemed to shift when he smiled at her this way he looked less tired and less restless. “I know what it’s like to be on unsure footing, it can be hard to figure out what to do.”
She smiled lightly… While it wasn’t too different, it was still a bit hard to get used too…
She nodded “Yeah…”
He held out a hand to her, “How about we have a walk together then?” he asks lightly, “You can tell me about what’s bothering you?”
She lightly nodded, taking his hand lightly… she began to walk beside him… Drem had still been trying to solve things of herself even before her lance had died, there was many things she wanted to have the answer for… she wished it was possibly to cheat to get the answers… but nothing was ever that easy…
She was quiet and he let her be as they walked through the station. Eventually he looked at her, “So, what’s bothering you?” he asked. Though it was silly to assume that she might know what was bothering her when he didn’t really understand what was bothering him.
“Ehh… Its just the new environment…” she hoped he knew what she meant, new people, people you knew gone, Different things… Things from before still haunted her… but she always seemed busy or rushed…
They kept walking through the halls of the station, he didn’t really have a destination but sometimes if ones feet walked long enough without a place to go, they would lead you somewhere you didn’t know you wanted to go. In this case, they did… “I don’t know Drem, seems like more than that. This isn’t that different from where you left, is it?” he asked as they approached one of the main observation decks, wide and tall windows out into space showing the planet and ships coming and going.
She looked through the window… She didn’t want to trouble him with her smaller problems… she knew he was dealing with his own…
While there was more, she wanted to say it was nothing like she would before… but she felt saying that would be rude… to say that to someone who cared… she always kept troubles to herself, so this was a bit difficult…
“Its…” she didn’t know how to respond…
He waited for her to continue for a few minutes before finally he said, “You know, with all of our problems, whatever they may be. Sharing them never makes them go away but sometimes it can make the burden of them easier.” he looks at her, “Now if you can’t, or don’t want to, I understand.” he looks out the window too and then he takes a seat on one of the plush benches by the expansive window to the outside world. “I can’t move past something that happened a few years ago.” that is all he said, someone had to open up and so it might as well be him.
It was clear after a few moments she just… she couldn’t say it… it was hard, while it might’ve helped, she couldn’t get the words out… she didn’t know how to show him… She preferred to stand, her legs cooperated… “Yeah…” she said quietly, looking out into the world… she turned to look at him, drem wasn’t a talker or loud like old… the drem of the other universe was different… not exactly like he would remember… there were things that still haunted her from there…
When she didn’t ask anything about what he’d just said, he sighed a bit and fell silent. It wasn’t an easy silence though, the kind that let people sit comfortably each doing their own thing but aware and appreciative of each other’s presence. This was different, the kind that stretched between two people with the burden of things left unsaid. It was uncomfortable, until finally he looked at her, “It’s ok.” is all he said, it was a confident statement, but it made the silence all the more palpable, as if suddenly the air was thick with it. The words hung in the air for longer than the sound did, what kind of absolution was he giving her? It was left ambiguous.
The USS Excalibur was in orbit and passing in the distance between the station and planet now. A couple of cargo ships were also out there, he looked at them as they passed and watched the ships as he wondered what she would say.
…After a moment, the thought reached her mind… what was it he couldn’t get past? She didn’t wanna be picky about it or nosey… she didn’t give off that atmosphere…
After thinking a moment, She slowly goes to say “What is it that you are unable to move past…” her voice rang quietly, But it was clear to him… she was curious, and she wanted to help… but she didn’t show it because she was afraid of being told off… being told she did not deserve to know, or that trust was not enough… so she never really tried to help others… it was foolish of her and she knew it, but it was hard for her…